My Friend was Killed by a Gang

       
           My friend was one of the nicest guys you could ever meet. He always had a kind word for everybody. When someone needed help, he was the first one to offer a helping hand. He could change the atmosphere of a whole neighborhood by his actions. That was the problem.

          There was a gang in the neighborhood who spent their time wreaking havoc in an otherwise peaceful community. They sold drugs, stole things, intimidated people and sometimes killed folks who didn't share their way of life. My friends actions were hurting their business. He was a walking billboard for a kinder, gentler way of life. He was like "walking truth" and taught people how to be good neighbors. My friend was full of joy and peace, he seemed to love everybody. That type of belief system - love, joy, peace, kindness and gentleness became a threat to the gangs way of life. So they threatened my friend.

          At first the gang just verbally abused my friend. They bullied and mocked him. They thought he'd stop if they belittled him, perhaps if they embarrassed him he'd disappear. When that didn't work, they threatened him physically. Their threats had no power over him. In fact it seemed to enlarge the love inside him. More people took on a new way of life because of the way he treated them. This infuriated the gang . Their drug business was sagging. Guys and girls were leaving the gang and youngsters stopped looking up to them. The gang leaders got together and conceived a plan to silence him for good.

          They waited until they knew my friend would be alone and then they ambushed him. Their plan was to make him suffer before they killed him. They tried to tell people that he was a fake so they could justify their actions. They beat him badly, they pretty much did everything they could to inflict pain on his body. They left him on a street corner with the life oozing out of his body. My friend eventually did die, but before he died he made one last statement that would change me forever.

          Several of us found him on that street corner. Somebody ran and told his parents. There wasn't anything we could do to save him, the gang had made sure that he'd die. With his last breath he asked his Dad to forgive the gang. He said they didn't really know what they were doing. The words of my friend asking his Dad to forgive the gang now live in my heart. I know I have to forgive others and they sometimes have to forgive me. I know I have to try and stay away from the temptations to hurt people because they have hurt me. The truth is: hurt starts somewhere and continues until someone has courage like my friend did. Hurt keeps infecting folks who reject the courage to stop it.

          Our neighborhood is different now. People tell stories about my friend. He seems to live on through their actions. Some folks try and live lives with the same kind character that he had. There was one guy I know who died recently. His life had some ups and downs, some bads and some goods. When he was just a little kid his mom would buy him new clothes to go to school. When he got home, his mom saw that he was wearing old shoes. She asked him where his brand new shoes were and he replied: "Somebody else needed them Ma, so I gave them to him."  He had a big heart that had a big hurt for other people. His life wasn't perfect because life isn't perfect this side of heaven. A hurting person killed him. Now I know another truth, I can create some heaven here on earth by giving shoes away, by forgiving folks who hurt me, because now I know that somebody hurt them first. Yeah, I think I'll put my heart in my shoes and give it away! Forgiveness - shoe it forward!

          If you didn't recognize my friends, the first guy was Jesus. The guy who gave his shoes away was DeMario, aka "Spazz" or "Spizzy." Jesus never did anything wrong. Spazz was like you and me - we've all made mistakes and failed to be like Jesus. I remember times when DeMario did the things that Jesus would do. That's how I will keep remembering him. I will not go out and hurt somebody because I'm mad that somebody hurt him. That would make me just another hurting person who keeps hurting other people. I'm asking God for the courage to be different, the courage to give the hurt to Jesus because he already took all the hurt on his own back. He's got my back.

 Thanks for your time. Go do something nice for somebody.

  

Just Believe

       As part of their education, we teach young people about the principle of "Cause and Effect." A simple explanation of that principle would be: "The cause is why the effect or event happened." If I drop an egg on concrete and the egg breaks, the cause is the dropping and the effect is the breaking. A good mentor isn't satisfied with just teaching principles. Your goal is to be a mentor who teaches how to remove causes that cause negative effects.

          I was talking to a Chiropractor yesterday who is writing a book on common sense in health care. His name is Dr. Michael S. Diehm and he removed the effect of back pain for my wife before there was a cause. This will require a little deep thinking on your part so please be patient with me. My wife was not experiencing any back pain but she went for some wellness care anyway. It's kind of like checking the oil in your car; your car will run without the proper amount of oil but it will eventually break down. My wife walked out feeling better knowing that she was in good shape. She was infused with confidence and that contributes to a positive life attitude.

          While Dr. Mike was contributing to the well being of my wife, he discussed some of the ideas in his book. He described some health care procedures that initially appear beneficial. I'm going to describe what I heard and it may not reflect entirely his viewpoints. Many medical tests reveal abnormalities and illnesses that we were not aware of. Some folks may have walked into a doctor's office thinking they were healthy and walked out believing otherwise. Treatment may be necessary and may also cause side effects that lead to more illness. When someone is given news that they have a disease, the mental state generally becomes regressively negative.  If the thought patterns become increasingly negative, the immune system can break down causing the illness to exacerbate. Hypochondriacs have been known to think themselves into an early grave. Their imaginations create diseases that eventually manifest themselves in the body and cause death. Deadly imagination is the cause and death is the effect.

          Dr. Mike told me about an old book called: "Magic of Believing" by Claude Bristol. I bought it for my Nook this morning. Here is something that I copied from the Forward written by the Editor, Dr. Robert C. Worstell:

"The idea that your beliefs can take power over the apparent universe we live in is an old one. Jesus spoke of it, as did Aristotle."

Another old aphorism taken from Proverbs 23:7 states: "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." Somehow we have taken our belief system and corroded our creativity with the effect of negativity. Instead of focusing and protecting the positive, we go looking for the negative. I am not jumping on a soapbox and preaching against preventive medicine. I am simply saying:

"Just believe in the best, because only good things are possible for those who just believe."

          Stealing, killing and destroying are the effects of one main cause - fear. We replicate those causes by feeding fear. Remove the food and fear will die. There are porn shops on many street corners. Porn is readily available on the internet and smartphones - more easily accessible than ever before. Main stream publications like "Sports Illustrated" display nearly naked women on their covers. We used to call that "soft porn." Everywhere you look, sexuality is cheapened and sold in the name of lust and greed. Prisons have more than their fair share of what we call sexual deviants; people who prey on others sexually. Why do we keep spreading the cause of porn if we don't like the effect of sexual predators? It's time to reexamine cause and effect. Which of our actions are causing more effects? How can we remove the root cause and destroy it before it becomes a killer effect?

Thanks Dr. Mike for fanning the flames inside me. I have watched many lives destroyed because we don't remove the causes. Young people join gangs because we haven't reached them with an opportunity to know what love is. We build more prisons to deal with the effect of lovelessness. Prison populations are ever expanding with a combination of new prisoners and returning prisoners. The rate of recidivism is a statistic that measures the effect of our inability to remove the cause. I will keep on believing that all children are gifted. I will keep on believing in them even after they are in jail. I believe in believing!

FYI - If you are looking for an excellent, wisdom filled Chiropractor, you can find Dr. Mike at:

Diehm Chiropractic & Wellness
500 W. Ray Rd
Chandler, AZ 85225
Phone: (480) 491-9699

 http://www.drmikewellness.com/

Thanks for your time. Go do something nice for somebody. 

Bob Kuebler
Founder / Mentor Force

Mentor Force is an organization of initiators.
We help young people who are at risk of leading impoverished and violent lives.
 We teach teachers, mentors and youth leaders how to build healthy relationships that make young people feel valued. Our goal is to ensure that every student has the benefit of being guided by a Mentor. 
If we can help you reach your potential as a Mentoring organization please contact us:  716-830-8240 or ywapbuffalo@yahoo.com

I'd Rather Write About My Wife Than Devalued Children

      As I write this, my wife and I are still in our "Morning Devo Mode." She is sitting near me. We begin our mornings by sharing a devotional time. She reads out loud on one day and I read out loud the next. What I read this morning was about listening and learning. Husbands and wives are often too busy formulating a judgmental response instead of listening. We should be listening with our hearts to what our spouse has to say. Communication is a spoken word from one heart to another. My wife has my heart when I really focus and shut out the temptation of judging her words.
 

  
          Today I'm struggling - I want to focus on my wife and shut everything else out of my heart. It's not working. A heaviness like a thick fog is hovering over my thoughts. A burden has been placed on my heart for children - especially the ones who fall through the cracks of society. The fog isn't blinding me to my wife's presence and my desire to love and serve her. The fog is redirecting the eyes of my heart to a more excellent way of seeing others. I know I can, and I will, be a better listener. Today God is speaking through a heaviness.

          I will have time later to enjoy some "Wifey Time." We will hike on a mountain and spend all day together. We love being around each other almost 24/7. We both have unique parts in God's plan for our lives. She supports me in a more excellent way everyday. I'm drifting now with the fog. Part of God's plan for my life includes youth ministry. I believe that all children are gifted. I've seen too many end up dead or in jail for a very long time. Yeah, I'd rather think about my wife than dead or incarcerated kids.

          My wife is sitting by a window with rays of a sunbeam pouring over her head. Her blonde hair is glistening and her shadow is cast upon the wall beside her. She's reading a book that no doubt will give her more wisdom and compassion for her to share with somebody in need. She allows God's love to reflect through her heart in her words and actions. She can lift a downtrodden heart with a smile from her eyes. She has stood beside me and witnessed the results of young people dying in Buffalo. She listens while I pray on the phone with a young inmate facing life in prison. She hurts with me.

          Everyday a child is faced with decisions that they may be incapable of making. Their young brains are not mature enough to make the right decisions. Without the guide of a mentor in their lives, children can easily make life altering or life ending decisions. Our education system is built to reward the best and the brightest students. Teachers with the compassion to reach all of their students are pressured to "teach to the test."  This ensures that they are rated highly enough to save their jobs. A good teacher has a heart to reach the hearts of their students. The students who do not learn easily are sometimes labeled "special ed." Most children who are labelled "special ed" begin to feel inferior. The feelings of inferiority can cause them to engage in disruptive behavior which is really a cry for attention. They begin to feel like they are of lesser value than other children; it's almost like a caste system. By devaluing children, we are casting them into a future life of crime, incarceration and killing.

          Are you beginning to see the heavy fog on my heart for the children who are left behind? You may have never watched a child die from violence or visited a prison but have you ever felt devalued? Can you understand why I would rather write about my wife and how good she makes me feel? If I focus only on my own goodness then I would be selfish. I hurt for children who become orphans, homeless, devalued, incarcerated or are killed. I hurt for children who feel unloved and do anything to feel wanted. I hurt for children who are enslaved by people who were hurt as children. I thank God for the love of my wife. She is like my mountain retreat where I can rest in her love. God reveals His plan for my life through that rest. We both put God first and each other second - that's truly a more excellent way of love.

          For the next week (3/3 - 3/10/14) we will be in the Phoenix, Arizona area. We have a fairly busy schedule but we will make room to provide value for young people who need some direction. If you know of any children who are in danger of falling through the cracks, we would love to help. On Wednesday evening we will be speaking to a group of young people at Without Walls Christian Center in Chandler, Arizona. Please feel free to bring some young people. I'm sure their youth group would love to share some time with you.

         My wife and I are Directors of Youth With A Purpose Inc. We have created a Common Core Character Education Program called Mentor Force. By becoming team members with Teachers, we use Power Moment Mentoring to help deal with emotional concerns and reinforce the study skills needed to attain a satisfactory education. Mentor Force raises grades, reduces suspensions and helps to minimize behavioral problems. All children are gifted and all children should have a mentor.

          Linda is my wife, my friend, my lover, my prayer partner, my teacher and my mentor. 

Thanks God for using the fogs of life to reveal a greater purpose. 

Thanks God for giving me a life partner named Linda. 

Thanks for your time.
Go do something nice for somebody.

Mentor Force is an organization of initiators.
We help young people who are at risk of leading impoverished and violent lives.
 We teach teachers, mentors and youth leaders how to build healthy relationships that make young people feel valued.  
Our goal is to ensure that every student has the benefit of being guided by a Mentor. 
If we can help you reach your potential as a Mentoring organization please contact us:
 716-830-8240 or ywapbuffalo@yahoo.com